Tuesday, September 21, 2010

A realization

I have really enjoyed having this blog to be able to go to and vent. It is nice when there is a comment to read or maybe a helpful hint or statement to help me threw a problem I have been having. I admit that I have not always been going and reading or even commenting on other blogs. I do try to at least go and try and help or give helping advise to maybe brighten someones day.

This week I have had not only a physical brake down but also a mental and spiritual. I have been literally stuck in my bed for the past 2 weeks to the point I can not even walk to do something we all take for granted every day just to be able to get up and go to the bathroom with out having to be carried, or even to be able to take a shower and get dressed. If I did not have my husband I do not know what I would do.

I went in with my husband to work yesterday and went and talked to the Navy Chaplin for this area and believe me he has to take care of over 3 states by himself that is a major task for him to have to do every week. I think finally in years I feel like I might be finally headed on the path that was intended for me to be following for years. I have let God back in my life and I had not realized until we were together talking and praying yesterday that my life had no meaning before that and that is why I had and have been in this slump and down in the dumps for the last 6 plus years. I do not know how I let my self go a stray. I do know know what I was thinking or what was going threw my head during these years. I know for at least 8 years because that is how old my daughter is I have listened to my mother and father preach at me that I need to not only get god in there life's but it was there responsibility as god parents. I feel that I have failed my children in many ways.

I know that it has only been a day but I have made a promise to myself and to god to try and live each day as I should in gods eyes. I know I am human and not perfect but that is why god is there he is not there to judge but to love you and help you threw times of need and joys in your day to day life.

I do need him and I need to find a way to let go of this pain I have everyday and to let god help me threw these trying times. I pray that he will show me the way and to help me let go of the pain I have and to give me the strength to better my children, husband, my live and spiritually. I just wish I would have done this years a go and let myself free of all that I have been needing to let go of and put into the lords hands, because he is there and he does work in ways we will never truly understand.

If I am not the only one out there and I know I am not that needs to be inspired again I hope this has helped you in a way.

God Bless 

3 comments:

  1. Andrea - wow - what a lot you have had going on in the past few weeks. Thinking good thoughts for you and your family.

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  2. God is good all the time

    We all go through certain types of phases in our life but the good lord is always there to keep us going...
    God Bless

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  3. Thank you for that Antonia, and Barb. I agree god has a plan and he has us go threw these stages in life to make us stronger. All I can do is put my trust in him and praise him for the life he has given us. God bless.

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